Roma

And so it closes....

I first went to the Cafe Roma when it was still called the Newsroom, sometime in 1987 I think. Before that my evil stepfather owned an arcade that occupied the same space, so I was actually inside the place even earlier (around 1985). A whole bunch of years have gone by since than and I just wanted to jot down some of the interesting and/or significant events that occured there.
My friend Jack Ott was the first manager I remember. Him and I went 4 wheeling and shooting pistols out in the desert.
I met my first wife there.
My sister worked there.
I worked there...I was in-between jobs and manager Matt was kind enough to hire a big mean hulking ex-bartender to make froofee coffee drinks, G-d bless ya Matt.
I saw good managers and bad managers and great managers and totally fucked up managers go through the place.
I made a whole pile of arrests there, or immediately nearby.
Me and a cop named Frank Massey helped a bunch of kids there, we even reunited a schizophrenic named Raven with his dad after he had been missing for years.
Me and the same cop got back Kate Hausbecks stolen computer, and busted the junkie that stole it. Even though it was sad....he was a decent enough kid before the smack got him.
I brought many, many trainees there, and tried to make them understand....
I read my first spoken word poem there.
I suffered my divorce there.
I rejoiced in my marriage to my wife Leilani
I brought my first born infant son in there, and my second.
I watched Sam growing up in there.
Played guitar for an audience there.
I ran the Monday Night Open Mic poetry for a while.
I painted and drew in there.
Typed search warrants.
Typed short stories.
Typed many, many poems, and scribbled many others on various found pieces of paper.
Bought art there.
Wrote most of my first book there.
Had my first book signing there, and had members of 12 Volt Sex preform an acoustic set in the middle of it, while Leilani sold books and smiled.
I bought the place a high chair.
I drank beer in the walk in freezer.
I saw plays.
I roller bladed 30 plus miles per week to and from there.
Did my college homework there.
I met some of my best friends there.
I hung out with Al Gibson, and Steve Custer there, two of the finest people I know.
I threw a few bad eggs out.
Very few.
I played pinball in there, especially against the amazing Dayvid Figler and the equally amazing Scott Johnson...They generally whopped my ass for me.
I attended many parties there.
I drank probably 10000 cups of coffee in one form or another there.
I practically lived there for the last 15 years. I could go on and on and on....but instead I will list the names of as many people as I can remember that touched me somehow there.
(in no particular order, with the exception of the first 5)Leilani Fagel, Samuel Fagel, Jacob Fagel, Mom, Grandpa, Al Gibson, Frank Massey, Steve Custer, Kim Thomas, Dayvid Figler, Bruce Issacson, Alan Issacson, Robyn (Bruce's lovely Wife to Be) Ryan Pardee, Gary?, Alex Getchell, Scott Johnson, Mike and Matt Servillo, Deborah Cohen, Dana Botwick, Trish Martin, David Ansen, Zog, Josh Ellis, Jamie Harris, Tommy, Melissa and especially Ryan Marth, the Porch Sisters, and now Shan and Jen (and Elliot!), Frank Beaton, Jill (his wife), Jay?, Shawn?, Agro Dave, Bakeem Lloyd, Vanessa (manager), Myong, Chris Selzer, L. Klein, John Emmons, Lisa Stein, Rico, James the Dick, Chris King (Scavione), Matt Chernoff, Mike Stratton, Greg Crosby, Saab Lofton (heeeeeee) Andy Hall, Andee, Jill, Aaron, Matt (manager), Crazy Bob, Kermit, The Cripple, Josh Brown, Carrie McCutcheon, Kate Hausbeck, Joe Schoenmann, Mikey Howe, Elana Howe, Jen Neal, Dr. Unger, Geoff Carter, Ami Carelli, Beth Lisick, Rodney Lee, Marco, Jack Ott, Carl (the other manager), Danny Mollohan, Cydnee Buffers, Brian G., Courtney, Jen Strong, Jabberjaw, Raven, Tony, Delight, Traci Allen, Bryan Guzman (poet Bryan), Tammi Silbaugh, Breeze, Barb Hollingsworth, Renee Christy, Lenadams Doris, Carl, B.J. Tammi Massey, Chrissy, Red Cap, Nick "weird harold" Wells, Bev Chris and Abbey, Andrew Ramsey, Phil Hagen, Nancy Jeffries, Rayann Figler, Harmony, Heather Hyte, Heather Morris (now Johnson) Bonnie Morris, Bethany, Wes, Penina Fingers, Doug Jablin, Anthony Biondi, Nuk, Chip Mosher, Gary Peck, Alan Lichenstien, David Gordon, Noel, Steven Gomez, Eavonka Bettinger, Gina (hopefully still drumming in Seattle), Chad Reynolds, Neal, Big Tony, Brian (Big B's ), Kit Williams, Dean Munney, Teri Lynn, Adrienne, Romney the Rocket, Joe Maloney, Uncle Perv, The guy who ran the original acoustic night, Spit (Lin Newborn), Jeff Schmacher, Ryan Jaegger, Rich Nogues, Shannon.....
Crap it is getting late and I've barley begun. I will have to finish this later. There are just so many memories. So many that I can't begin to add them up. All things must die as they must live. So goes Roma. My heart tips fondly at a dear friend. I pray another place that lives and breathes the culture of Las Vegas rises to take its place. In the meantime, Ciao for now.

Another Great One

From My Wife....

Harry: Honey, you know I really need to lose some weight.

Leilani: Sure, Honey, why is that?

Harry: Well, I got this beautiful tattoo and I want to be able to take my shirt off without being embarassed...

Leilani: I understand. It's kind of like hanging a Monet in a trailer, huh?

Dig?

Life is poetry dig
You live it any way you feel it
Dancing in the mud or reaching for the sky or
Pissing down the leg
Life is a woman dig
Soft touch and breath hot on your neck
Perfumed hands silky and forever caressing could be in the club hopefully at home it all reeks of rhyme
My kind dig
See I just breathe the world
Sucking in the moments and blowing out pain in great racking huffs
What's left behind is clearly mine
Etched on the looking glass of self in permanent lipstick
Or maybe carved by diamond
Or shit
Who knows I just knows it is now
The world around me fucked by war and bad choices if I choose to focus
On the poison yeah the poison
It seeps through us all ugly and unforgiving
A weeping inner child that was beaten by the game
Gotta lose it dig
Cast it away like bad dreams and just groove on
Sucking in the sights and glory y'all
Feeling for the better day the brighter way and pray it stays
In the end you can fret and folly
Better yet curl up and die with your head hidden on the inside of your own reeking shame
Or you can seek yeah
Bust out an idea and chase it down
Dig
Find the right in the wrong the meter to the song the strong
(The Strong dig)
They, whoever they is, some abstract beating thing that signs paychecks
Don't exist
Just Me, I, We, Us
Hear, here and there
We gotta join up now, spread the love
Find the bright lights happenstance better half that rides the cosmos just outta reach of the buried
But always here for the taking if you really want it
Step into the light step lively now see the good contrasted with all the motherless dead
And be glad
Be glad you and those you love alive Dig
Dig?
Dig it.

Copyright 2003 Harry R. Fagel ARR

Scoop

For my buddy M.McNett. One of the finest damn detectives this side of the galaxy.

Human beings are vessels
Great jars that hold the soul inside
Energy crackling from synapse to synapse
Code written in the tongue of G-d
If you took a baby chicken
And held it in your hand
You could feel the heart beating the feathers
Warm against your palm
Sense with the primal side of self
That it lives
Kill it
Fry it in oil
Savor every morsel as you chomp the remains between clenched teeth
Tasty it becomes
That sense of life a dim if even resident thought
Just food
Just meat
Like people
They breathe and fuck and talk and laugh
They cry and think and stink and fall
They go and come and see and do
Until some mystery or truth comes along and they die
When it's murder
They end up on a plastic tray with blood drains on the side and bottom
An overhead light illuminates them fantastically
As the cutting is begun
Sharp is a relative term
A scalpel is the epitome of that
Watching the examiner slice and dice and open up the secret package we all are
Exposing what is certainly better left inside
Tissue and organs and blood and tendons and bone
Revealed to the watchful eye of the truth seekers
Some might balk at such a final indignity
I did not
I merely observed
As meat and more meat and more meat was removed, weighed and dissected
The once human being scooped out like so much potato salad
The truth revealed in the middle of all that gore
A knife wound puncturing from front to back
A tiny cut on the outside
A ripping wound on the inside
Killed him
And now the truth known and disseminated
A final pop as his skull is opened and his brain removed
Doll-like the now empty mannequin stares at nothing still
Just a bag of rotting
The soul aint there
So it doesn't hurt
It's just like the chicken
Without life a person is just so much
Worm food
So I strive to live
As long as possible and
Keep seeking the truth

Copyright 2003 Harry R. Fagel ARR

Best Dressed

I look at my infant son
I see the bright colors he wears
The puffy one piece fleece coverall with footies
The cute hat with ears that stick up on top
I wonder why
I can't dress that way too
We can't dress that way too
Imagine a world where we get into comfy
Oversized britches with tan airplanes stitched in the sides
Or a button down tuxedo shirt that ends in an easy access button flap
For elimination or procreation or flatuation
How simple it would be
All of us
Osh Koshing our way to work
Too long sleeves serving handy as nose wiper
Going to the Gap to buy an adult sized bib for that special date
I would have a closet of two piece matching flannel button ups with cartoon characters emblazoned everywhere
Why the pretentious overtones of BeBe and Gucci
Let's Carterize
I picture myself in a bright blue shirt with extra wide button side collar,
Red overalls with a yellow moon and a green star being jumped over by a happy cow
And white socks with slippy bottoms and a comfortable pair of felt shoes
Imagine
We would all get along then
We would all be too cute to hate
Imagine

Copyright 2003 Harry R. Fagel ARR

Hole

Sometimes I do sink somewhat. Even though it would seem that my incredibly lofty ego would carry me through all manner of everything, occasionally I do find myself sifting sand in the dark. I have been dealing with my lack of motivation for physical fitness the last 3 weeks, along with a close family members major trauma in her life. Also with the fact that I can never be 100% soul baring in this blog due to my career. Anyway I just want to get myself back on a highly motivated track. I'm sure the truth behind this negative outpouring revolves heavily around the fact that my party this year had a much smaller turnout than in years past. I guess that made me feel my age a bit, or something. My artist side groans in self debasement while the hard guy in me just shrugs it off to the weather. Either way, I was very happy that the people who did come were there. They are a wonderful bunch of friends, and I love all of them. Those that didn't I'm sure had good reasons, I just miss my friends that I don't see very often and these big parties I have are a way to catch up. Anyway enough whining. I have been blessed with more beauty in my life than I would ever want to take for granted, even for a second. So let me move on.
The best is yet to come, I'm sure.